What's Left?

So it was the end of a challenging day, dinner was made, people had eaten, kids were asleep. Now some time for me? No, bills had to be paid. NOT what I felt like doing.

I had tea out of a nice tea cup yesterday. I was planning to just have a cup of tea, but my 2-year-old wanted tea too, so I figured I'd make a little pot for her, then I decided I'd just make a pot for both of us. Then, since she was going to use her little tea cup, I decided to use a nice tea cup. But once she saw my tea cup, she wanted one of THOSE. Quite adamantly (in a nice way), so I decided to let her. Knowing the risk, I gave her one that wasn't an absolute favorite. Still, my tea-drinking experience was less than quintessential, since I was braced to, at any moment, deal with a broken tea cup.

By the end of the day, I decided to answer the question of the day in the affirmative. It was a rhetorical question, though; I didn't allow myself the time.

At some point, I contemplated whether brushing my teeth in the morning counted as doing something nice for myself. Even I realized that was pretty lame. But yesterday, when I didn't take the time to do it, I realized that it is a nice thing to do for myself.

Today, I've flipped through a catalog that caught my eye.

I'm feeling quite uninspired. Paying bills yesterday took a lot out of me. Turns out one was due yesterday (i.e., 10 hours before I was paying it). On some level, I think I knew it was due on the 5th, but I hadn't sat down to pay bills yet. I guess I always hope that I will be given some time to deal with the financial stuff, rather than having to squeeze it out of the small amount of time I have for myself. I'm reminded of the old saying, "A woman's work is never done." (These days, I think a lot of us--moms or not--have work that is never done.) So, even if it is never done, when do you stop? (NOT before paying the credit card bill, some would say.) I could stay up all night working on stuff, and people would hardly be able to tell the difference. What about ME? When do I get some time? (What do I even want?)

Bonny Joy